Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Formation Dismantled

It’s a well known fact that girls tend to travel in packs. Makes it all the more harder for us hunters to separate one from the pack. There are different formations in which a pack would choose to travel in. let me elaborate on one of these formations.

The trio formation

As implicated in the formation title, this consists of three girls. A fat girl, a HOT girl, and an okay looking girl. For discussion sake, let us name these three girls.

Fat girl: Cindy

HOT girl: Sandy

Okay girl: Mindy

Cindy is a fat, unappreciated chick. She sees how the hot girls have it easy. She sees how the hot girl is so popular. She longs for a guy to “fall in love” with her. She hopes that as long as she keeps hanging out with Sandy, somebody will take notice of her. Hoping some of Sandy’s hotness will rub off on her. Girls like Cindy often pound their faces with make up and wear “fashionable” clothes. It just looks pathetic and mind numbingly horrible. Cindy is delusional. Cindy isn’t hot. Cindy is a sad case. Poor Cindy.

Sandy is a hot girl. She always gets what she wants. Guys ogle over her. She is a popular gal, probably bitchy and whiny. But her friends overlook that so then they get to hang out with her pompous, perfectly tuned ass. Girls like sandy are materialistic. Extremely so. She has a crappy personality. Actually the only thing working for her is that she is hot. Picture a beautiful beeeaaautiful Ferrari. Now picture it covered in excrement. That’s Sandy. Sandy isn’t a very good person. Sandy is a bitch. Sandy thinks material is everything. Poor Sandy.

Mindy spent most of her time living under Sandy’s shadow. She’s the OK looking girl that people barely notice. Of course, people at least NOTICE Cindy, because she’s a fat ass. But they don’t notice Mindy. Mindy wants to be noticed just like Sandy. But she cant. So she compensates by sleeping around. At least then the guys will know she’s alive, but alas, she’s labeled a skank. Lets face it, she is one. Mindy is looking for the wrong thing in the wrong place. Mindy is Paranoid and delusional. Mindy has no self esteem. Poor Mindy…

Friday, March 07, 2008

Tagged by Thom with no way out

Thom tagged me. Yea, its lame. Its not something I’m likely to do, but since Thom is almost as foul mouthed as me and I like her rants, and because I have nothing better to do, I’m doing it. Plus she’s hot. So there.

Don’t expect much. Here goes.

A- Available? :Not likely. Unless it’s free coffee.
B- Best friend:No “best friend”. A bunch of close friends. I love my homies.
C- Cake or pie? : Neither. Fucking hate sweets. Except if there’s nothing else.
D- Drink of choice: Black coffee coz I need it. Red Bull coz it gives me wings.
E- Essential thing used everyday: The evil eye. Yes. I use it everyday.
F- Favorite color: Black. Because I am.
G- Gummi bears or worms: What the fuck kinda choice is that?
H- Hometown: I keep telling myself it’s somewhere other than here. Maybe Miami.
I- Indulgence: Nicotine. I can’t stop.
J- January or February: I feel dumber just given the choice. Whoever came up with this deserves the fires of hell just for this dumbass question.
K- Kids and names: I hate kids. Go figure.
L- Life: It never sucks as much as you.
M- Marriage date: obviously a woman came up with this survey.
N- No. of siblings: that’s personal information that you shouldn’t know. Lets say 8.
O- Oranges or Apples: Apple the fruit, Orange the juice.
P- Phobias: virgaphobia – fear of virgins.
Q- Quote: “hate me, but do it honestly” – Kain.
R- Reason to smile: when I know someone is doubting his/her reason to smile.
S- Season: Rain. The one thing that makes me feel at peace.
T- Tag three people: since Thom stole MY friends, I guess I choose Bandey, Fis and Darthsath.
U- Unknown fact about me: I hate most things… wait… you probably know that. I hate narrow minded people trying to pass off as open minded intellectuals? Oh, you know that also… I am strangely proud of my jaw. There, I said it.
V- Vegetable you don’t like: Veggies piss me off.
W- Worst habit: procrastination. If I conquer that, I have achieved perfection.
X- X-rays you had: My head… for some reason.
Y- Your favorite food: Can’t decide between Italian and Indian.
Z- Zodiac: Aries. The God of War. Don’t fuck with me.

You all have a nice day.