Explicit: Maldivians Only!

Being a Maldivian, I feel that I should write a tribute to Maldives. I choose to praise the Maldivian language, Dhivehi.

The beauty of Dhivehi language lies within its capability to curse and swear. Never in the history of mankind has there been a language in which you can swear so fluently. Its an art, really…
I can be considered foul mouthed… somewhat. I do curse a lot. But it was not that long ago I was ignorant on the beautiful art of the Maldivian language.

Dhivehi is the only language in which you can combine a fruit and an animal and it sounds hideously awesome.
eg: Bilamagu Bakari (combination of pickled cucumber with a goat)
It is used to describe someone who has run out of comebacks (hiuh kollaafa in golaeh)
Instead of saying “dhen thilhaa thi inee huih vefa, bakattaa!” you can say “dhen indhey bilamagu bakatteh hen!” see? Its efficient!

Dhivehi is a language in which you can say something that’s NOT a swear word, but make it sound like a swear word.
eg: Findhana = type of bird. Now add “goh” in front of it and you get “goh findhana”. Voila! Instant swear that’s not a swear!

Dhivehi has the most awesomest curse combos EVER! You can string together so many things together and render the receiver of the swear helpless.
eg.1: Thilhaa dhon ambu osheh buriah jahaigen ove’ athun halaabala, kes himaaru!
An amusing example of a simple combo that can be used to put down a person.

eg.2: nagoobalhaa suvaru ooru himaaru kuththaa kambalhi kambalheege’ dhe’ dharin!
This is an example of something you can use to describe a person to his/her face.

If there was a Ph.D. in cursing, we Maldivians will master it. All hail Dhivehi, the most awesomest, the most cursable language!!

The Burugaa ultimatum

Whats with chicks and burugaa's? Its like a fucking fad. I mean, they wear burugaa, but they lack the principle behind it. Its like this... at least heres how i think how it is...

scenario one: A chick wants to emanate an aura of innocence.
This is the most common of the buruga chicks' motives. Maldivian chicks, although mostly.. umm.. how do I say this in a politically correct way... *ahem* Maldivian chicks, although mostly sluts, like to put on the facade that they are umm... eerrr... "innocent". This is highlighted in my previous article virginity. So buruga wearing chicks swear, smoke, get high, drunk, sleep around. in short, they do what all normal girls do. so why do they need to put on this facade? intriguing, isnt it?

scenario two: "My mom told me to"
The same shit from above goes here. You KNOW that a girl aint gonna be magically BECOME good coz she starts wearing a burugaa. Here, the blame goes to stupid parents. Instead of filling a girls head with propaganda or making an effort to EXPLAIN that getting drunk is wrong, getting high is wrong and sleeping around is wrong, they just tell her to wear a burugaa? im not complaining though, I got no problem with a drunk girl who wants to sleep with me. *winkwink*

scenario three: An actual good girl exists.
Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...

In closing, i want to say that may i wish that this "fad" wears off soon. because us guys like seeing cleavage and thigh. so please, to all the slutty girls in disguise out there... REBEL AND TEAR THAT BURUGAA OFF YOUR FACE!!!

all girls need to be "appreciated". especially if they are hot.

... I'm back...

Hey guys and girls and ladies!! Im sorry about my long absence… I dunno if I was missed, but still I’d like to think I was. Call it ego, for me its just wishful thinking. I was busy with work (duh) and did not have to time to go online, blog, go for coffee or even properly shower. Yes. I was THAT busy. Not that I LIKE being busy…

Anyways, I have some stuff that I wanna let out, but that would have to wait. I’ll be updating a full blown article type thingy very soon. So I’ll cut this gay “what I have been up to” post short and leave you to do your daily routine usual mundane stuff.

P.S. I missed you guys too. *sniff*

Rock on.