Thursday, March 19, 2009

What the Amjay is this?

Its been a long time coming, but it had to happen. I have met with the world famous director known only in the Maldives, Amjay. As I approached him on the street, acting all curious with questions and shit… I couldn’t help but notice a dramatic decrease in weight in Amjay. Maybe not so dramatic compared to his movies, but still, pretty much so.

Me: Hey Amjay! What a pleasant surprise!

Amjay: Oh, who are you, and isnt there a law against being so strikingly handsome?

Me: No there isnt, and I don’t swing that way.

Amjay: Neither do I! I was just kidding of course *uncomfortable shift*

Me: Riiiiight…

Amjay: So, did you want something?

Me: Actually I wanted to ask you something.

Amjay: Sure… wait… what are you doing with a huge wrench?

Me: Oh, don’t mind that. Im just going to fuck your face up later on.

Amjay: *gasp* You are going to hit me in the face with that?

Me: is that what I said? I meant I have some plumbing work later… yeah… that’s is.

Amjay: ooookaaayyyy…

Me: So why the Decrease in weight? Bored of not being able to see your own penis without a mirror?

Amjay: Actually, I havent been able to sleep or eat well… I heard there was some blogger out to get me.

Me: Really?

Amjay: Really. I heard he’s skilled at torture and he’s merciless as well as charming and good in bed.

Me: Must be a real dangerous man, huh?

Amjay: No shit! Have you heard anything about this?

Me: Somewhat.

Amjay: I just wouldn’t know how to defend myself against such a strong and powerful man who relies on brute force and good looks.

Me: Enough about this handsome and manly blogger… why are all your movies crap?

Amjay: You know how when you were a kid you had such awesome ideas and you wanted to draw them out but you couldn’t, because you couldn’t draw?

Me: No, I could always draw.

Amjay: I never outgrew that phase. Only I am a fim maker and I cant direct worth a shit. Don’t tell anyone, though.

Me: Everyone knows.

Amjay: Darnit!... … hey… wait a minute…

Me: what?

Amjay: you are extremely good looking. Are YOU this blogger out to get me?

Me: Yes, I am.

Amjay: *starts running*

At this point, I proceeded to run after him. It was no problem to catch up, considering he is a fat git. And then I beat his face with the wrench I had, until it was fucked up. Needless to say, he cried like a girl. Until he died, that is.


Anonymous said...

Amjay is dead? There's hope for the industry yet.

bulhaa said...

*clap clap*

AzMyst said...

wow you beat his face with the wrench until it was fucked up!! hope you were able to get the wrench back in working condition afterwards.

paperclippenny said...

Maybe you should wear a mask and become a caped crusader and save us from the evils of bad directors. Next Uwe Boll perhaps

Anonymous said...

RIP Amjay, we won't miss you.

moyameehaa said...

omg wtf have you done. i thot u were goin to take care of all the directors. both of them i mean. nahula is still out there, making stuhpid movies. you are our only hope. do something. gud work, keep it up. and while you are at it, why dont you take care of the comedian problem too.


The Shadowrunner said...

Good work, man. Now can I have that wrench back?. I need it to fix some nuts on my Flying Bombs.

knaschru said...

wrench?? he deserves a worse fate man!

Frostmourne said...

Please contact me for any additional supplies of hardware tools, as I believe you've yet to slaughter quite a few. (The remaining of the industry that is). And do prioritize Azey. I don't want to live to see the day that candy-cock does the Beyonce's Single Ladies dance, because I know I will. So please. Gasp!

Iya said...

@anonymous:: amen, brother.

@bulhaa:: *bows*

@azmyst:: i'm afraid the wrench has teeth and bone embedded into it now. I'm keeping it as memorabilia now.

@paperclippenny:: uwe boll, huh? i'll think about that.

@canofworms:: thats right. nobody even reported it on the news.

@moyameehaa:: nahula looks like she should be taught a lesson... with my cock.

@shadowrunner:: sorry, you are never going to see that wrench again.

@knaschru:: maybe YOU should have done it, then.

@frostmourne:: who is azey??

ie cco said...

hahahahaha @frostmourne u are right!!! hahahaha the comments are even much funnier..

dude u need to get rid of azey!!

and i wonder what size the coffin would be 0.o

Anonymous said...

oy iya just come out and admit that you have amjay wet-dreams!!

Anonymous said...

ssshhh iya lurrrves azey