Monday, December 07, 2009

Free excuses, free of charge.

We see chicks with buruga. And we see chicks without buruga. As it was fashionable to don a buruga two to three years ago, it is now a fad to take it off. Here are some excuses to do so. Please note that these excuses are mildly researched so that parents may accept them too, because most Maldivian parents are kind of stupid. Any parent who lets their girl prance around in Islamic slut wear is safe to be considered so.

To sum up, the following are excuses or reasons to take the frikking thing off.

1. It doesn’t match with your clothes

2. It makes your hair frizzy

3. It makes your scalp itch, due to a scalp infection, which occurred because of the restricted airflow to your scalp

4. You want to have a career and everyone knows burugees can’t get ahead in this world

5. You wore buruga because you had sinned and wanted to atone for them. Now that you’ve failed to atone, might as well do it half naked.

6. Deep down, you are a skank. But you don’t want to make a mockery of religion.

7. You’re wearing tight jeans that show of your ass anyway, so why not show more?

8. You aren’t doing the world any favors by not showing us cleavage.

9. Cleavage is important.

10. All hail cleavage.

11. Listen, you all are probably going to hell anyway. I’ve seen the list, and it is preeeetty long.

12. We all know you like to show us that bodonkadonk.

13. If your grabastic, you owe us some eye candy.

14. It no longer matches your moral view. (you have no morals)

15. It makes you look fatter than you really are. No, I’m serious.

16. Why look like you are at 50% when you can be a 100%?

17. The beardies target chicks in buruga for their sex slave industry (statistically unproven, but a scary thought.)

18. Here’s a good one: Wearing buruga makes you irresistible to men, and you are endlessly hounded on the street.

19. You aren’t within your parents reach in a foreign land.

20. There was supposed to be a twentieth point, but I can’t be bothered.


shaf said...

Number 8, 9 and 10 < LOL. Hail cleavage. Of course!
And, number 7, ahh, if they only had a manual to follow. Oh wait! There is one.

AzMyst said...

All very good reasons, but nothing beats No. 10! Anni should make it the country's slogan for the year 2010!

Anonymous said...

parents are stupid? i am 101% sure ur stupid and mad too... and for YOUR information, your post is none sense.

Anonymous said...

bodankodonk??! haaahahahahaa good one iya! i like!
...and at the other anonymous guy, only really stupid parents could've spawned you, so your comment is a rather moot observation

anonymouse said...

the dog ate my buruga!

Anonymous said...

first of all, ur sick, and i mean SICK by means of serious mental disorder as your life prolly sucks and u lash out ur self hate by expressing ur warped opinions onto the world, which no one but the dumbest o em out there accepts. *whew* gawwd, u do have a good influence on bringing out frankness. *pat on the back*

yeah i wear the so called cursed buruga u thnk o as the big downfall, which is why i am lashing out the prejudicial comments. i cant be bothered to point out which numbers the reasons you wrote are, but in general, no, it doesnt make my hair frizzy, it so does match with my clothes, PREETTTTY well, my scalp is very healthy, and I am getting pretty ahead in the world as much as you are, even more cox i am not mentally retarded either.and sinning u will do with o without it, the buruga has nothng to do with it, it leaves ppl like u curious, it boggles your mind. it has earned me respect, and in a larger perspective (which ur narrow mind might not be able to venture), has instituted value.

bottom line, i was darn bored and u provided entertainment. keep writing kiddo. (how old r u anyway, 10??)

crawler said...

whats grabastic?? :S

Sheri said...

I love your list. Although wrt budonkadonk, most of the burugas wear tight jeans anyway (aside from the ninjas)

Iya said...

@shaf:: manual? why wasnt i informed?

@azmyst:: It should be the country's slogan. period. forever.

@anonymous 10:36 :: none sense? 101%? is? bleh. you are just too intelligent for me. but yes, your parents must be stupid to have birthed you.

@anonymous 10:50 :: I was the one who should insult the parents here!! dammit!

@anonymous 10:11 :: They arent that tasty. even dogs wont like 'em.

@anonymous 10:30 :: I DO hope you read this response to your comment.

first of all, it must really suck to be you, with no sense of humor and all. there there. im sure you have boring friends and equally yawn enducing parents to keep you company. now that thats out of the way...
I dont care if you wear the buruga or not, im not going to apologise for my post, especially for a self righteous hissy fit throwing female dog (bitch).

If you think its the buruga that has earned you respect, then you are the narrow minded party here. it probably means you are ugly. no one wants you to think they are flirting with you, so they all act polite.

also, calling someone a retard doesnt make you smarter. you DO know this, dont you? since your high and mighty buruga gives you intelligence and respect and maybe even get your ugly ass laid some day. dont worry. you'll get there.

last of all, this is a humor post. if you cant tell the difference between humor and serious writing, I suggest you read minivan news or something.

also, good luck with being an ugly hissy fit bitch.

@crawler:: it means easy to grab. meat on them bones. grade A maldivian meat.

@sheri:: true, that. ninjas need to lighten up too.

Sheri said...

@the anon with the massive post - I think the buruga is already affecting you, as your spelling is atrocious.

ie cco said...

haha love it iya. and i got one too :P to add up to ur list. :P keke

ps the funniest thing is the word verification says "fareedu" :/

crawler said...

My god! hahah. can i borrow ur vocabulary?

The Shadowrunner said...

Women hate the burugaa, actually. They just wear it to "conform". I know this because I have a windmill in my beard.

Nash said...

cleavage in 3 points? :P

oh boy

n yeah about no.7> i thought the exact same thing :S

Anonymous said...

heh heh good shit !

Azhoora said...

Wow. i think i got a kick out reading the comments more than the post itself! lol